The Pattersonian

There was a time when being under the age of twelve was the best time in a person’s life. They had adoring parents cheering them on in their various activities, adoring extended family (that they got to spend a significant amount of time with on extended visits) and caring neighbours (that they spent even more time with than their extended family). They went to school with their friends, played until it was time to eat dinner, did some homework (not one of the highlights) then fell asleep fitfully to do it all over again the next day. They would look forward to family trips, not think much about getting “the sniffles” and their toughest questions to their parents would be things like “why are some kids mean?” A question that was easy enough to answer, “it’s probably because their parents are arseholes”.